So obviously, you read everything that doesn't start: Mike:
Eris Tryout Script:
Mike: Oh Eris! Goddess of Chaos!
Daughter of Discord! Concubine of Confusion! Where are you?
Eris: Yo doo! Where did you get that rad 2 by 4?
Mike: From over there!
Eris: Well it looks like "god" has you in a nice trap. I can't help you. I couldn't even share this weed.
Mike: S'ok. I got ten joints and three blotters.
Eris: Oh Groovy. Well, I'll be around. Good luck! May the one hand clap on!
Baby Jesus Tryout Script:
BabyJ: (Laughing, that slowly builds. He has just been tossed onto he ground) So ya figured me out eh?!?
Mike: I should have known, BABY JESUS!
BabyJ: I'ma punch yo' dick ow-ffff (off)!
Mike: You little butt plug I'm gonna shove you so far up yo mama's ass they will swear you was yo daddy's dick.
BabyJ: The hell you will, I'm gonna fist your ass with the Lincoln memorial!
Mike: I'm going to rape you.
BabyJ: YEA?-Well I'm gonna…wait. -Did you just say?…